I'm sorry to hear about your recent diagnoses and especially your daughter. There's such a special connection between children and their mothers...somehow that connection must have triggered both outbreaks. That has got to be so hard. I think the suggestion for counseling is a great idea. You cannot let guilt over this rule your life. Dating might be a little hard for her when she gets older, however, I still date and I've live a normal happy life. You have not ruined her life. I think of all the diseases and conditions out there that I could have... and I would rather have herpes than something else that really is horrible.

As your daughter is so young, please be vigilant regarding washing her hands so the virus so not spread to or around her eyes and teaching her how to care for herself. There was a man at my company that had oral herpes, however, it had also spread close to his eyes. Anyways, I just wanted to mention that as children are always touching everything. Didn't your doctor give you anything for your daughter? I hope so. If he didn't he should be shot! The ointment is called Zovirax. That's what my doctor originally prescribed to me when I contracted herpes, and I still use it. I don't take Valtrex as I don't want to be on it every day (plus it's expensive). I have infrequent outbreaks and when I get the feeling one is starting, I start taking acyclovir and use the ointment. It goes away within days. Stress is a trigger for outbreaks. I do my best to keep stress/anger to a minium, if I let it get out of control it will trigger an outbreak.
Hope some of this might help you...
My prayers are with you ...
Angie