28th December 2007
Oh I love you guys! I can't tell you how much it meant to log on and find such loving and sincere words. It feels good to open up to you all, seeing as how most people in my life know nothing of me still being on sub. AND still weaning off cigarettes.....they would FREAK! So i hold in all this terrible guilt and can't really share it with anyone, it is refreshing to be able to come on here and vent and not be judged. Thank you all for being there for me, if i could i would hug you all so tight right now! ;)
I've been awful sick to stomach today, the vomiting is out of control. I had told my doctor about it, he gave me Zofran (which is SOOO expensive that my insurance only covers 9 pills a month!!!!), but i took my last 1/2 tonight. I'll probably be calling him tomorrow to get something else called in. I have gotten used to being sick, but this "sick" is out of control! When i can't even keep down water and saltines then it's a problem. It's freaking exhausting i tell ya!
You all are right thought about me letting go of the guilt and taking it easy. I DO plan on being off the sub. completely BEFORE i deliver, so atleast i have plenty of time to do it slowly. I just felt rushed when the doctor said "get off asap". But he doesn't even have to know that i'm still tapering, he wouldn't even begin to understand and i don't want to deal with that. I can't get the Subutex because i take my Moms' prescription for them and she takes subaxone. I supposed i could ask her to get the subutex instead of the other on her next visit, it's worth a try. It wouldn't affect HER any differently would it???
Well guys i'm off to lay down again. I was able to keep down a little mac-&-cheese and Powerade for dinner so i'm hoping that if i lay down it'll stay down.
Ughhhhhh, the only good thing is me not gaining weight yet! I'm sure that once i get the "eatums", it'll be all downhill from there! :D
Love you all and hope you all have a peaceful night sleep!
Thanks again to KADEE, CAPTNANNY, WIREMAN, MICHELLE, G8TRGRL!!!! I'm so lucky to have you guys in my life!
I've been awful sick to stomach today, the vomiting is out of control. I had told my doctor about it, he gave me Zofran (which is SOOO expensive that my insurance only covers 9 pills a month!!!!), but i took my last 1/2 tonight. I'll probably be calling him tomorrow to get something else called in. I have gotten used to being sick, but this "sick" is out of control! When i can't even keep down water and saltines then it's a problem. It's freaking exhausting i tell ya!
You all are right thought about me letting go of the guilt and taking it easy. I DO plan on being off the sub. completely BEFORE i deliver, so atleast i have plenty of time to do it slowly. I just felt rushed when the doctor said "get off asap". But he doesn't even have to know that i'm still tapering, he wouldn't even begin to understand and i don't want to deal with that. I can't get the Subutex because i take my Moms' prescription for them and she takes subaxone. I supposed i could ask her to get the subutex instead of the other on her next visit, it's worth a try. It wouldn't affect HER any differently would it???
Well guys i'm off to lay down again. I was able to keep down a little mac-&-cheese and Powerade for dinner so i'm hoping that if i lay down it'll stay down.
Ughhhhhh, the only good thing is me not gaining weight yet! I'm sure that once i get the "eatums", it'll be all downhill from there! :D
Love you all and hope you all have a peaceful night sleep!
Thanks again to KADEE, CAPTNANNY, WIREMAN, MICHELLE, G8TRGRL!!!! I'm so lucky to have you guys in my life!