13th May 2004
Lynn - I swear... being sick and all I screamed laughing about the mixing of the meds. I feel that way too sometimes. Seriously, today I've taken Suboxone, Xanax, Welbutrin, Z-pack (antibiotic), Zelnorm (IBS w/constipation), a strong B vitamin, Advil, Tylenol...Oh, and 1,000 mgs of vitamin C. That's horrible! OMG - if you actually write down your meds... that sucks! 9 different types of meds today. Now, if I wasn't sick... how many would I have taken? Scratch out the vitamin c (possibly - I take a lot 'cause I smoke and smoking EATS UP your vitamin c), scratch the advil and tylenol and the antibiotic so I guess that would leave me with 5, right? I don't always take the IBS meds... only when I look pregnant because I can't go to the bathroom. The Suboxone is so bad with the bathroom thing. It makes me feel bad... Anyway, the zelnorm helps but I don't always take it... In fact, I have had my script for a while now and just started it again yesterday and haven't had any in about 3 months.
Anyway, now that I've freaked myself out by taking so many pills... How are YOU doing? Are you still stuck on that same amount of hydros? I know it's hard... Aren't you terrified of the day when your cousin 'runs out'? However, because you are taking such a low amount... your wds will not be that bad. I hope you do realize that!
Also, I did want to tell you (again) that this welbutrin has really helped me come out of that horrible place I was in. I know you said it helped you years ago and it has helped me tremendously. And I'm still only taking 100 mgs. My doc wants me to get up to 300mgs? What do you think? How many are you on? Even w/the Sub and xanax, I'm still pretty awake at night and during the day because of the med. Which is great because I feel like I've been sleeping for the last 6 months being on lexepro. That just did NOT work for me... I feel so stupid for thinking it was the Sub making me so damn tired. What an idiot! How much I could have avoided if I would have just known... including my little fender bender I had.
Jenny... can't believe your experience in rehab... didn't read about that prior to this post. I'm very proud of you for doing so well. I'm glad you have done this without the use of a maintenance drug - actually both you and Rosie. You guys don't know how sometimes I feel so trapped by Sub because I can't just stop taking it. But, that's the way things are right now... maybe in a while they won't be that way. It's so funny because every week (basically... now) I fuss and moan about Suboxone and she just won't even entertain me getting off of it. She just stops me dead in my tracks when I start talking about the weight gain or whatever... She will NOT let me get off of it. She knows me better than I know myself and she KNOWS I will relapse and I believe she is right. But today, I just had to laugh at her when she cut me off and started talking about how it has helped me so much. I literally said 'you just aren't going to hear of it are you?'... she said 'you are NOT getting off of Sub... not yet'. She's right!
Take care... I'm going to check out the ADD place and see what I can find. Love you guys! And where is Michelle? I miss her!
Anyway, now that I've freaked myself out by taking so many pills... How are YOU doing? Are you still stuck on that same amount of hydros? I know it's hard... Aren't you terrified of the day when your cousin 'runs out'? However, because you are taking such a low amount... your wds will not be that bad. I hope you do realize that!
Also, I did want to tell you (again) that this welbutrin has really helped me come out of that horrible place I was in. I know you said it helped you years ago and it has helped me tremendously. And I'm still only taking 100 mgs. My doc wants me to get up to 300mgs? What do you think? How many are you on? Even w/the Sub and xanax, I'm still pretty awake at night and during the day because of the med. Which is great because I feel like I've been sleeping for the last 6 months being on lexepro. That just did NOT work for me... I feel so stupid for thinking it was the Sub making me so damn tired. What an idiot! How much I could have avoided if I would have just known... including my little fender bender I had.
Jenny... can't believe your experience in rehab... didn't read about that prior to this post. I'm very proud of you for doing so well. I'm glad you have done this without the use of a maintenance drug - actually both you and Rosie. You guys don't know how sometimes I feel so trapped by Sub because I can't just stop taking it. But, that's the way things are right now... maybe in a while they won't be that way. It's so funny because every week (basically... now) I fuss and moan about Suboxone and she just won't even entertain me getting off of it. She just stops me dead in my tracks when I start talking about the weight gain or whatever... She will NOT let me get off of it. She knows me better than I know myself and she KNOWS I will relapse and I believe she is right. But today, I just had to laugh at her when she cut me off and started talking about how it has helped me so much. I literally said 'you just aren't going to hear of it are you?'... she said 'you are NOT getting off of Sub... not yet'. She's right!
Take care... I'm going to check out the ADD place and see what I can find. Love you guys! And where is Michelle? I miss her!