Ok all, I'm going to CT it again. I have to. Yes, I'm in real pain, and yes..I'm prescribed pain medication by my doctor...BUT, I HAVE to stop. I have no control over ME. I would eat them like candy if my husband didn't keep them and give them to me only when I need them (and even then, I take more than what I'm prescribed). I'm taking 10-15 Norco's daily...and this is where I've been everytime I've went cold turkey, so I know it's possible. I'm just SO scared this time for some reason. I've done this a few times over the past two years...the longest I've been on them is 3-4 months..the shortest~ a month. It really doesn't matter though, it seems as if the withdrawal is just as bad no matter how long I've taken them. The one and only time I didn't have a real hard time going off of them is when I had a few Ultracet samples, and I used them during the withdrawals (I don't know if it was the Ultracet, the grace of God, or what..but I experienced very MINIMAL withdrawal symptoms that time around..and I had been taking 10,15, sometimes even more a day of the Norco for about a month). I've now been on the Norcos for close to 2 months, and I do have a script for Ultracet, so I'm wondering if I should use them to help me through it all (I HATE the Ultracet, hate the way it makes me feel, etc...so I'm not too worried about taking it more than a couple of days..I would only take it to get me through the really rough days). I have been blessed with a WONDERFUL, AWESOME opportunity in a few months (I wish I could be more specific, but I just can't right now), but I HAVE to be off of the pain medication....for no other reason than the massive guilt I feel for taking it the way I take it. That leads me to my biggest problem right now....GUILT. I feel full of massive shame and guilt..due to taking this medication in excess, and knowing that I have NO control over it. I honestly don't know what I'll do about the legitimate pain issues I face without it, but at this point...I don't care...I just want to stop NOW. Please...any encouraging words, any and all support, etc. would be so appreciated...Yes, I know that I need further help to KEEP me off of it, but first...I have to GET off of it. Just remind me that the worst will be over in 4-5 days...and that I can do this. I don't know what day exactly I will start this (as you all know, I have 5 kids, so I have to make arrangements to be "sick" for a week or so), but it will be SOON. I have SO much to live for, and as I said above...I have this ONCE IN A LIFETIME opportunity that I refuse to mess up because of my desire to "feel good" all of the time. I'm just so freakin' scared of the withdrawals...I've done it before, so I know I can do it again..but I really need all of you to keep me positive, and to remind me that I can and will get through it all.

I'll post again soon and let you all know when I decide to do this...it will be soon, I promise. Thank you for always being so encouraging and supportive...I really hold a special place in my heart for each and everyone of you.

Hey Christianmom...hang in there, o.k.???? You know what you gotta do, just get it over with. Comtemplating "quitting" will only make you MORE guilty and depressed. W/d is better if you are busy, i never believed people when they used to say that, but it is very true. The more you can move around and walk or even work-out....the easier the w/d. Go into this with a positive attitude. It will help so much. I say YES to the ultracet for a couple of days,but be careful with them because i heard in higher doses it causes seizures.... :eek: I would do them til about day 4 then you should be having very minimal symptoms. Just BE POSITIVE, pray, get as much exercise as you can...and try to eat good food. I am out here in cyber-space thinking about you....hang in there
luv,
LISA
HAPPY HALLOWEEN :) :) :)

Hi C-mom....i know you have pain issues, but the only reason i encouraged you to stop is because you said in a few months you have a wonderful, awesome opportunity arising and you have to be off of narcs....
How does the ultracet work for pain??? Have you ever thought of drug holidays, where you take a weekend or so off of pain meds, i guess it kinda lowers your tolerence. I would check the pain management board and see if anyone knows there. I feel for you, girl!!! If you gotta stop then make your mind up and do it. If not, just try to cut back a bit, your body will adjust to a new dosage in 3-4 days of doing the same amount. You really need to decide if you can function with the pain w/out narcotics. Pain, will really effect your ability to be mommy....but so do the pills in a way because of what they do to our soul. Try not to be so hard on yourself and enjoy your Halloween. This is my favority holiday. I gotta go carve my jack-o-lantern :D And the older kids are out for the night sleeping at friends, so me and my hubby are actually gonna get some "alone time" ;)
Hope you can sort thru this....you are in my thoughts and prayers...
luv,
LISA