Hmmm....interesting about the ears. The first thing I tried to understand when my son was young (and did NOt get lots of ear infections) led me to read "The Spirited Child" and then "The Out-of-Sync Child" and that mentioned an inner ear inbalance that effects behavior. We had tried an Occupational Therapist, who recommend a Soma Sound Therapy treatment, but I do not think that was at all effective. Then, we turned to doctors who decided the easy thing to say about our son is "ADHD." He will be 12 in Feb. - so it sounds like our kids are running parallel.
I am very interested in learning more about the more positive discipline techniques that you use, as time out has been a ridiculous battle in this house. He does seem to be responding better to the "carrot" methods more than the "stick" methods, but when he is giddy it feels more as if I am corraling a wild creature than disciplining a child! If you have a favorite book to recommend, I would appreciate it!
Yes, I have found the hardest part is what other people expect of him, such as grandparents or uncles who do not see him often, but then spend a couple of days and do not understand the mood intensity/swings. Its a lot of really spirited great stuff, but matched with "incorrigibleness" too!