3rd July 2003
hey okie. Yes thats' right...all of those meds A DAY!! and sometimes i would add restoril or fiorinal to the bunch. I would go through 120 soma, 120 percs and 120 loratbs (those are my "monthly" meds from one dr)in about 5 days. But ahhh...then a had a 2nd dr (my backup) who who give me the same meds for pain, but also restoril to sleep and fiorinal for headaches. He would give me 90 of each, and i'd gobble them up in a week...then i'd call the 1st dr for refills (which he's never denied)to get me through week 3, then call dr #2 for refills to get through week 4, then i'd go in for my monthly visits and it would start all over again. my little friends consumed every part of every day. it's just crazy!! it's been about a year and a half since i've detoxed from everything. I've always had something around when i'd run out to get me through. I honestly don't know how i'm not dead. all i can say is thank God i'm not. I have 3 children, 17, 13 and 10. they've all seen me take meds before, but they don't have a clue mom's an addict. The know my pain gets very bad and think i take them occasionally.
when i made up my mind to quit a couple of wks ago, i called dr #2 and told him i wanted to be discharged. No questions were asked. I called him on one of my "happy" :) days cause i knew if i waited til i was detoxing i'd cave in and go see him. I'm glad i did cause now that bridge has been burnt, even if i did call him. neither dr knew about the other. my bf of 13 yrs has found them maybe 3 times in the past 3 yrs but see, i had a "plan" mapped out looong ago - I had prescription bottles from way back that had a quantity of only 10 on the bottles, so i would only keep 10 of each pills in the bottles, which was my next dose. everytime i took the 10, i'd fill them up with another 10. and i'd hide my real prescriptions. so if he happened to find them, i'd say "oh, they're from a long time ago" (the date on bottle was nov. 01)..."the dr gave me a few incase i needed them...i forgot all about those!!!"...that way, if he decided to flush them i knew i had 450 pills hidden up in the attic....it's amazing how clever and innovative we become to protect our "little friends"! ;)
gosh i didn't mean to ramble, it just feels sooo good to talk to other people who understand what you've been dealing with and are going through :).does your husband know?? does your mom know or is she just visiting?
when i made up my mind to quit a couple of wks ago, i called dr #2 and told him i wanted to be discharged. No questions were asked. I called him on one of my "happy" :) days cause i knew if i waited til i was detoxing i'd cave in and go see him. I'm glad i did cause now that bridge has been burnt, even if i did call him. neither dr knew about the other. my bf of 13 yrs has found them maybe 3 times in the past 3 yrs but see, i had a "plan" mapped out looong ago - I had prescription bottles from way back that had a quantity of only 10 on the bottles, so i would only keep 10 of each pills in the bottles, which was my next dose. everytime i took the 10, i'd fill them up with another 10. and i'd hide my real prescriptions. so if he happened to find them, i'd say "oh, they're from a long time ago" (the date on bottle was nov. 01)..."the dr gave me a few incase i needed them...i forgot all about those!!!"...that way, if he decided to flush them i knew i had 450 pills hidden up in the attic....it's amazing how clever and innovative we become to protect our "little friends"! ;)
gosh i didn't mean to ramble, it just feels sooo good to talk to other people who understand what you've been dealing with and are going through :).does your husband know?? does your mom know or is she just visiting?