Okay, can anyone spell agoraphobia? Now I know why I haven't left the house...

I'm exaggerating, of course, I went out, went to the store, located meeting site and went to pharmacy to pick up naughty, naughty imitrex. Okay, I know I've been using a lot of my migraine meds this week. I tried not to use anything yesterday but last night my head was killing me and I couldn't sleep and then I start thinking, which is what they tell you, that if you don't catch it early the med won't work, and what if this lasts for days, and maybe it'll go away for sure this time... Anyway, pharmacist comes over for a little chat about making sure I'm not overusing them, not taking them preventatively, said "Okay, I'm going to dispense this, but..." I wanted to scream. I felt like I was picking up oxy and was sitting there telling him I accidentally spilled them down the drain or something, even though I didn't lie to him, I just omitted that I thought the migraines were because I'm in w/d. Anyway, I know I read that when you stop drugs you have to sort of relearn everything, and I will learn all those subtleties about what's really addiction and what's not, but I just felt exactly like I did when I would lie to get DOCs. Guilty and lying.

Also, the neuro who prescribed them told me just not to take them more than 4 days/wk. I took one on day 5. Excuuuuuse me.

Okay, calming down, he's just doing his job, this is all me and my head... breathing, breathing. To quote one of my favorite songs, this isn't trauma, it's not even drama...

So, how are y'all?



I nearly forgot the best part, he was telling me that there were other meds to deal with migraines, such as morphine. Hahahahahahahaahahahahaahaha.

LOL Morphine..perfect. And you just stood there and nodded and said yep...but we're not going there!! I can't believe he lectured you about Imitrex and then suggested Mrophine. That's toooooo funny. Find the humor in everything - it makes this easier.

Ah yes the lying. To the doctor...yes it still hurts - especially at night, to the pharmacy..yeah I just need them a little early because I'm going out of town, to the other pharmacy....no I don't have my insurance card with me, I'll pay cash, to the other doctor...ummmm no I don't think I've ever taken that before...oh okay..thanks for telling me it will make me loopy - I'll wait until I get home to take that for sure, to the husband....honey I don't know what happened to all my money this week - I guess it's because gas has gotten so high - damn oil companies. Makes me feel horrible to think back about that stuff. So...I don't generally think back about all that stuff. I did just then because once again..wanted to tell you you're not alone...been there done that and much worse - not proud of who I was then - but I am now. That's another sure sign for ya - it gets better - it really does. Pretty soon you'll be able to laugh at all the silly stuff you did and said and it won't hurt so bad.

Hope you enjoy your meeting tonight. Keep taking those deep breaths. You're doing fine.

Ordering a scary movie...love them...haven't chilled out and watched a movie in I don't know when. Hooray for me!! I'm SO SO happy to be free of the prison of the little amber bottles.

Hey sk777, :wave:

How are you feeling tonight? Hope you got to your meeting. Mine was great. Just what I needed. Ours was a candle light meeting (every Friday night). Good thing too, guess why. Crying time again. :p But not for me, for the pain of the person sharing. Wonder if it's possible to run out of tears? :D

BeginAgain, it is nice to be able to laugh at all that crazy sh.. we use to do. And I did get a laugh. :p

I wonder if that Pharmacist is crazy. Imitrex vs Morphine. Must own stock in the company. lol

Sorry I haven't been able to be there for you much in the last day or so. Couldn't get out of my head either. That's a dangerous place for me to be. hehehe

[QUOTE]some things are hard for me that aren't for others

We think and say the same as you are feeling now. But when you start to go to meetings everyday, you're gonna hear the same thing said by someone else. I love it when someone is sharing something and people (including myself) are nodding their heads and smiling/laughing because we've said the same things, done the same things and know we aren't alone.