10th December 2006
I have a son who is 29. He started having a major drug problem 10 years ago. I found out recently that my mother, who has been in and out of rehab for years, has been giving him everthing from deaulaid, oxycotin, mepregan, ect. When we try and put our foot down with him, he runs to her. She of course, just makes things worse. The most recent episode is that I threatened to call the police when he put my six year old grandaughter in danger. He got mad at me and was going to put her in the car with him. I knew he was mixing pills and alcohol. He at least left her with us. THe next day he shows up and ask 4 times where she was. Like he couldn't remember.
His Dad refused to let him in the house. He ends back with his Grandmothers and in the hospital. And of course this is our fault for "making" him sleep in his truck. I go to the hospital and talk with Docs. They say he has phenomnia but may be caused by a fungas. He also has a bad blister like place on his upper arm ( where tatoos are put). It could be a spider bite or something else? They had to refuse to run a test on him because he was taking something "Dear old Granny" had given him while taking Demerol from the Doc. This statement came from the lung Doc. He had noticed that both were passing out and unable to talk. It was disgusting to see your son and mother in this state. And of course it was my fault, the Doctor's fault, Gods fault, ect. I waited untill the next morning to try and talk with him. Hoping he would be somewhat sober. It didn't do any good. It was like talking with a brick wall.
I told him he could come home but only if he was ready to get his life togather and lay the drugs down, if not for his sake then the sake of his daughter. He flatly told me to leave. To his shock, I did.
The hospital seemed to be in a real big hurry to get rid of him. So, now he is living with Granny in a drug infested pig pen. I fear so much for his life this time. I have never walked away as I did this time. He has called twice but will not leave a message. I ache for him to ask for help. Needless to say his dad has lost faith and doesn't want him back. It causes total anguish when he comes home. It's not our home anylonger. He has several unpaid tickets from open containers, reckless driving, and 2 DUI's. He has no DL or insurance now. I sometimes think Jail would be the best thing, but I feel so quilty for this. THis time I have found a part of myself NOT wanting him to come home. I feel only hate and resentment towards my mother. I went through the first part of my life dealing and trying to help her. Now, it seems I will spend the last part of my life dealing with another junkie.
Desperate
His Dad refused to let him in the house. He ends back with his Grandmothers and in the hospital. And of course this is our fault for "making" him sleep in his truck. I go to the hospital and talk with Docs. They say he has phenomnia but may be caused by a fungas. He also has a bad blister like place on his upper arm ( where tatoos are put). It could be a spider bite or something else? They had to refuse to run a test on him because he was taking something "Dear old Granny" had given him while taking Demerol from the Doc. This statement came from the lung Doc. He had noticed that both were passing out and unable to talk. It was disgusting to see your son and mother in this state. And of course it was my fault, the Doctor's fault, Gods fault, ect. I waited untill the next morning to try and talk with him. Hoping he would be somewhat sober. It didn't do any good. It was like talking with a brick wall.
I told him he could come home but only if he was ready to get his life togather and lay the drugs down, if not for his sake then the sake of his daughter. He flatly told me to leave. To his shock, I did.
The hospital seemed to be in a real big hurry to get rid of him. So, now he is living with Granny in a drug infested pig pen. I fear so much for his life this time. I have never walked away as I did this time. He has called twice but will not leave a message. I ache for him to ask for help. Needless to say his dad has lost faith and doesn't want him back. It causes total anguish when he comes home. It's not our home anylonger. He has several unpaid tickets from open containers, reckless driving, and 2 DUI's. He has no DL or insurance now. I sometimes think Jail would be the best thing, but I feel so quilty for this. THis time I have found a part of myself NOT wanting him to come home. I feel only hate and resentment towards my mother. I went through the first part of my life dealing and trying to help her. Now, it seems I will spend the last part of my life dealing with another junkie.
Desperate